Bojibian- It don’t mean a thing July 17, 2008

Actually, Philadelphia, it means a lot.

I’m not really a concert girl. I don’t dig going to The Kyber and getting wasted to bands that just come off sounding like noise. Plus it really ruins the elastic in my skinny jeans when I start sweating too much. Really. Or knowing my luck, some 230 pound oaf kicks me in the ankle as he throws his arms above his head and staggers forward in a half-drunk leap screaming ‘Yeahhhhhh!!!‘ Thus, permanently disabling me and my hawwt heeled look. Ugh.

My music exploration is typically an online experience, discovering new groups through music blogs. Minimizes my interaction with groupies. Honestly, I can’t say that the Philly music scene promotes itself as much as it should.

This city has a penchant for undervaluing talent!
Which is why they all leave, right?

But then there is Philly Rising, an open mic night every Monday at World Cafe Live. I went a few months ago. O. My. Phucking. G!! Great music gives me that light-headed, heart-beating-out-of-my-chest sort of pleasure. Ah, Bojibian.

Pronounced bo-JIB-ee-an, these guys are brutal. Beautifully untamed. When I first saw them, they took the stage in sunglasses; like, ‘Hey we don’t take ourselves too seriously…’ but then proceeded to seriously rock out. The band consists of Stephen Lorek, Niles Weiss, James Scullion and Dylan Mulcahy. They pull off style and talent. Phucking down-right panache.

I won’t even mention how young they are because I’m sick of how every youthful music act has to be some surprise… I mean really, how many geezers do you know who still have passion? Life is draining, man. SO counteracting my extremely jaded nature, I listen to Bojibian songs that are light, fun, LOUD, upbeat. That’s the best way I can say it, as I’ve never been one for categorizing music, and Bojibian won’t cage themselves in either:

Stylistically, the group draws from many different influences, at times sounding like some sort of post-modern mash-up of pop, post-punk, classic rock, post-grunge, Southern rock, and arena rock…or something like that.

So.

This Saturday.

Go to World Cafe Live.

Bojibian will be on at 9 pm. They will also be selling their debut album which they have been working on furtively for the past 2 months. Commendable for a band that’s only been together since the beginning of this year!

HEAR THEM on Myspace. My fav? Hallway. Although Upstroke and Call Me In The Morning have been stuck in my head lately

click to buy Tix!!

I’ll be sad when they leave us for NYC.

I kid. I kid. Well, sorta.

Oh, Lady of the Night July 17, 2008

I composed this letter in my head last night as I was trying to take my dog for a late-night jaunt and found myself aggravatingly trolling behind a ‘lady’ of questionable reputation.

Trannie-licious…

Dearest Trannie Hooker,

I know you feel the need to saunter, shaking that jello-o all about, what with, trying to attract the ‘Johns’ and all… but could you please speed it up before I let my dog chomp on your STD-ridden ass? We both know what corner you’re walking to, so get your ass there already. Slut. And a word of advice, stop looking behind you at every car that passes darling, it looks a little desperate. Oh, wait. Nevermind, Get Money Guuuuuurl!

Always Your Neighborhood Bitch,

Phreaked

Eventually I just crossed the street… and then on the way back home I think I saw one of her ‘co-workers’ coming out from behind some building with a guy. Ah, Philly at it’s best.

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia July 12, 2008

Well except on people’s faces. Hah.

Well I would normally want to give you a whole week of tasty tidbits, but there is just SO much going on today in the city I thought I just focus on this day in particular. Hey, maybe you’ll see me out because I am definitely going to be trying to make my way between all these great events.

We ALL already know I’m insane for Etsy, so how excited was I when I found out they are having CRAFTADELPHIA featuring local Etsy designers at the Mew Gallery?? I’m there.

At 9th and Christian it’s actually not too far from Mostly Books over at 529 Bainbridge, my favorite used book store in the city!! I mean really, it looks like this shitty little hole in the wall bookstore where used romance novels and westerns might abound but that place is so much more than cheap paperbacks. It goes back three more rooms, HUGENESS! I love delving into the cooking and self-help sections. ( It’s across from the Philly Aids Thrift… another AMAZING place) I just can’t wait to go over to the “South-ish” side of Philly and search for treasures.

My friend is having a bbq up in No. Lib. that I want to attend, but somewhere in that time I see myself looking for a little drama. So why not go watch a reenactment of the storming of the Bastille?! Yes, Bastille day is July 14th, and considering we have a prison just sitting around over on Fairmount, why not do something in honor of our 0% French-speaking population?!

Servant: The people, mam’n, they’re staring! They have no bread!

Marie Antoinette: Then let them eat cake!

Damn, that bitch had style.

Believe me, the French, masters of pastry, are cringing at the thought of this right now, but before Marie is executioned at 5:30ish today, she’ll be loading us up with Butterscotch Krimpets (oh my fav!).

Lastly I might head to a bar around the corner from my house that has been completely transformed (read: de-ghetto-ized)

Uwishunu is reporting:

Check out Billy W. of monthly parties Robotique (Medusa Lounge) and Hip Replacement (The Khyber). He’s now got a weekly thing called Shake Your Tambourine where he spins seriously serious disco with a smattering of early hip-hop and R+B in the mix.

This all happens at The Institute, which used to be the infamous Jesse’s Tenderline Cafe at 12th and Green. The new proprietors have kept Jesse’s North Philly charm intact, but they’ve managed to fix the place up a bit and bring in some fancy beers.

Shake Your Tambourine
Saturday, July 12th, 10 p.m. – 2 a.m., free,

The Institute
12th and Green, Philadelphia, PA
www.institutebar.com

Ah, gentrification at it’s best.

Airline Adversity = Style Serendipity July 11, 2008

Your accessories need to be seasoned travelers as well.

After all, every jet-set miss knows that a striking necklace or flashy bangles can instantly improve the casual outfit; giving you more fashion mileage from a tight suitcase to boot! The same can be said for handbags. Three is all you need, even for a long vaca.

One should be this…

Check out the airline bag recently featured on thestylephile:

This Kim White purse is made from fabric originally intended for use on a United Airlines plane. Hah, yeah as if any new planes are going to be made anytime soon.

Retailing for $210 (including tax and shipping) this bag is not only adorably kitchy; the transition from day to night with this same simple tangerine dress is abundantly clear.

Day accessories: Wrap this beautiful purple scarf around your head and keep your feet relaxed in these Steve Madden flats. (Phreaked owns a pair just like them!) Go Boho chic doll!

Night accessories: Play up the black leather details of this purse matched with the earthy tone of the fabric by going with black and cork accessories. (Stewart Weitzman Wedge Sandals & Cork Cluster Earrings)

Mizz Thang June 27, 2008

Philly Horrendous

I did not need to see that this morning…

You, hauling up the Spring Garden subway steps in your patchwork plaid shorts.

I think this might have been an attempt to look like a coquette co-ed on your way to the Community College, alas, these Amazing Technicolor Dreamshorts do not hide the fact you look at least 35, and indeed, only create a larger fat-ass.

I’m not saying clad yourself in black alone. But as I watched you, I could only think the manufacturers of these “short shorts” truly did you a disservice by making these in your size.

May I suggest some capris without “spectra-vision”? You’re a shorter, curvier woman so choose a length about knee level as to not look even smaller… may I suggest:

They hug you at your waist, one of your tiniest parts and will accentuate that great lower curve of your back but flare out from there leaving your legs feeling free.

This is going to be a hot sticky summer in Filthadelphia mamn, and I don’t need you running around pretending to be any spring chick. CAMOUFLAGE that cellulite, NOW!